A Father's Inner Monster

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What attributes does a good man have to acquire to be considered a good father? And in the confines of modern social constructs and norms, what chances does a good man have to be regarded as one?

Postmodernism has managed to infiltrate logical thoughts and influence the mere fabric of reality. It has swirled abstract concepts such as marriage and attacked gender roles and put them in a blender of disgusting woke ideology that murders morals and shames rational thought.

In this era, a fourth wave of feminism rises from nowhere to reduce men to words such as “misogynistic.” A word they often misuse and overuse.

But first let’s understand what it means a good man, shall we?

According to Dr. Jordan Peterson, “A good man is a man very capable of cruelty but has it under control.” For him, “If you are not capable of cruelty, you are absolutely a victim to anyone who is.”

A man must become dangerous; he must be a monster in control to be respected and be able to protect those with whom he loves. The more competent a man is at cruelty the more success a man will have at peace.

Throughout history good men have built the cities we live in including roads, buildings, power lines, and the sewers that we do not see. Men have built the vehicles, planes, submarines and rockets. Good men work in the most dangerous jobs like on oil rigs, and they work the longest hours. Good men work in scary and claustrophobic environments underwater and retire on average five years later than women, even though women have a longer life expectancy.

Throughout history good men have protected women, children and the “weak” from scum that walk the Earth. Good men fight wars, PTSD, depression and suicidal thoughts to offer a better future for their families.

Good men sacrifice their lives to see their children and their families have a shot at the pursuit of happiness.  

A good man is unapologetic.

Good men that have their inner monster under control are the pillars of society and if they keep being attacked and damaged, society will crumble. There is absolutely no question about it.

But does being a good man equate to being a good father?

No, a man needs more attributes to be a good father. Being a good man is just half of the recipe.

A good man capable of cruelty becomes a dangerous father in control of his darkness to protect those he loves.

An emotionally intelligent and mature man becomes a good father when he can stay afloat holding on to everything when his surroundings are at risk of sinking. Even if he himself is suffering from depression, we just work it off for the sake of our family.

He does his best to be at all maternity appointments.

He helps set up the nursery.

He talks to his baby during the entire pregnancy.

A good man becomes a good father when he understands that some gender roles are interchangeable, especially when both parents work.

He changes diapers.

He wakes up in the middle of the night when his baby is in distress and sooths her/him until they are peacefully back to sleep.

A good father makes a bottle when his baby is hungry.

He shares household chores.

A good father will find a life-work balance to spend quality time with his child and family.

He reads to his children to help with their vocabulary development.

He plays classical music to his baby for her/him to develop better physical and emotional health.

A father becomes a teacher and a mentor.

He will not punish, he disciplines.

A good father listens, understands and shares his knowledge and wisdom.             

A good father will never abandon his child.­

A good father exercises and eats healthily, keeping his testosterone high not for himself but to be able to lead his family and live longer years to enjoy his children.

There is a plethora of things a good man must do to be respected in society.

But none of that matters if you do the right things for your child to respect you and look up to you, but most importantly for her/him to love you.

My long days at work, my doubts in life, the stress, the insecurities I may have, the melancholy and nostalgia, all of that vanishes once I see the way my baby Luna looks and smiles at me. I am her world, and she is mine. And for her, it’s that without doubt, I will keep feeding the monster in me. That monster in me is exceptionally capable of cruelty, but that I have under control. Just like a martial artist that trains to avoid fighting and keep peace. I will keep studying my own darkness, because understanding and controlling your own darkness is the best method to deal with the absolute darkness that plagues the world. And I will protect Luna from it with all my being.

I, myself, am uncertain if I am a good man, and even more unsure if I am a good father. However, I will always strive to be a better man and even a better father for her, my baby Luna.

On this Father’s Day, remind yourself that masculinity is the power of good men to keep the world running. That power then transcends and evolves once you become a father. It is now your responsibility as a father to be the strong foundation of your family without complaints and always proud.

Be a good father and use that inner monster to stand up for what you believe in, and protect your family from cruelty, insanity and nonsense.

On this Father’s Day, enjoy being the MONSTER everyone believes you already are.